Thirty

Thirty years ago Dean and I entered our apartment as husband and wife for the very first time where our 95 year old landlord had left us a gift taped to the door. Carefully clipped, was a newspaper headline that read "FOR GARLIC LOVERS ONLY" along with his best wishes for a long and happy life together. Dean reminded me that wasn't how I spelled my new last name in case I had forgotten. But mostly I remember how we laughed that 95 year old Arthur was so witty and clever. We giggled at the thought of him even knowing what love is at his age. Newlyweds know SO much about love right?

Fast forward thirty years...having a lot more perspective and wisdom, we escaped to the Dominican Republic to celebrate the milestone anniversary!

It's hard to believe that we have been together for that many years. I have been asked how we stay married for so long. I will tell you, I don't know exactly! But maybe it's just simply committing to STAY married.

I would never say that marriage is easy...we all know it isn't! But then achieving something worthwhile never is easy. For better or worse...the balance can seem to weigh heavy on the worse side at times. But the good times far outweigh the bad in the end. 

I believe love and marriage goes through stages. The first being all about romance...it's the easiest. The fodder of Hollywood and romance novels, romantic love sells and we can't get enough of it. 

The novelty of new love leads you to think about your partner night and day...idealizing everything about them. You want to spend every moment together because your brain is literally addicted to being in love.

After the dazzle of romance wears off, it's time to dig down and really get to know that person you married. I adore his passion for living and energy to start exciting new projects. And he is my number one fan when it comes to quilting or photography or anything else I love.

Living with a person day after day, year after year can be difficult. Your once idolized perfect spouse now has habits that might make you crazy like never shutting the cupboard doors (I do that), or leaving things laying around (he does that).

And let's face it, children can really complicate a marriage.

Through the years we have had moments of complete joy and perfection...

our wedding, births of each of our four children, graduations, special holidays, sunshine and powder ski days, great vacations and becoming grandparents.

But we've also had lots of imperfect moments...

sick babies with sleepless nights, worries over teenagers,

tough decisions, mistakes, employment worries...

and moments of great sorrow.

The loss of Jocie rocked our world and still leaves us unsteady.

But those moments of imperfection, hardship and sorrow, though they might be gritty and nasty and completely unbearable have helped shape our marriage and brought us closer together.

After 30 years our love is deeper and more mature. I know that unequivocally he has my back. And when I make him crazy, I know all it takes is a freshly baked pie to apologize.

Looking back...it's been an incredible 30 years being married to my sweetheart. He makes me laugh, surprises me with large Diet Cokes when I need it, and understands me like no one else can. It seems old Arthur might have known something about love after all.

Girls Weekend

August came and went so quickly...filled with family and great times. I blinked and suddenly it is now the middle of September. With Lawyer Girl home for a quick visit in August, it was the perfect time to have a little girl's weekend getaway. No stinky boys allowed.

We started with dinner at Vinto's where Olivia got a "V" tattoo from a very handsome waiter, along with a bowl of mac and cheese.

We checked into the hotel where we quickly found the "pool-drink" as Olivia calls it.

Basically it was Mama Cass, Auntie Didi, and Nanny Lisa doting on Olivia the entire weekend. You might even say it should be called Spoil Olivia Weekend instead of Girls Weekend!

 She adored all of the attention of course.

 A session of toenail painting; Olivia chose a lovely shade of teal.

 She gets bigger and brighter every single day!

Where else can you lay your blond hair on soft down pillows and have a little "paddy time" before breakfast!

I have always loved being the mother of three beautiful girls...but I love being the grandmother of a beautiful grand baby girl even more!

Breakfast of champions.

Nearly three years old...her little self is growing up so quickly.

My breakfast of champions.

My daughters...beautiful and brilliant.  It is remarkably fulfilling to see Olivia being loved and guided by both of them. Certainly we feel Jocie's absence, as I imagine we always will. Realizing we were so close to Library Square, we walked the short distance to see if we could see Jocie's name inscribed on the Intermountain Donor Services Monument.

Lots of name searching on the glass wall and finally an internet google search...we found her name surrounded by other donor heroes. I can not give enough praise for this organization and all the great things they do...and proud Jocie is a part of it.

I found it sweet and comforting that Jocie was included in our weekend plans and I have to believe it wasn't accidental.

Finally...no girls weekend would be complete without a little shopping. Olivia found a way to occupy herself in Anthropologie.

And so did I!

Girls Weekend  was an overwhelming success and a new tradition has most certainly been started!

Family, It's what We Do in Summer

Maybe it's the music coming from my computer as I edit these Family Reunion photos...maybe it's the cloudy grey skies outside threatening rain...maybe it's that school starts this week...or maybe it's the knowledge that summer is winding down too quickly; but something has me in a melancholy reflective state of mind.

Family reunions...they are a guaranteed part of summer activities whether we like them or not. We recently had reunion parties on back to back weekends with Dean's family and my own. These photographs remind me how much emotion, chaos and fun we have with our families...so many things to love.

 I love that we celebrated Grandpa Owen's 83rd birthday and had him pose with a bunch of his Great Grandchildren. Unni and Gramps gave each of them a Mickey Mouse.

 I love that Uncle Chet stopped to tie his nephew's shoe before helping him down the backyard slide.

Unni HATES having her photo taken...which makes me so happy to have this one of her smiling with her arms around her sweetheart.

I love that the men of Dean's family had the rare opportunity to be photographed with their Native American brother who was in town. Who incidentally put up with way to many hand raised "How!" references.

And speaking of rare...look at the post hiking beard the hubby is still sporting. I imagine these two grown men were up to no good when they were little men.

I love that Olivia and Henry will finally actually hold still long enough that I can photograph them looking at the camera...and Grandpa Owen doesn't!

 I adore how Grandpa choked up with emotion as he posed with his youngest grandchild Chet.

 Baby Levi, who might be the chubbiest, happiest baby I know...lights up his grandma's eyes like no one else can.

 I love how families are changing. John and Annette's has grown

with the addition of wonderful in-law children...

and a new little red-headed one.

Switching sides of the family now...but not the sentiment. We marked what would have been my Grandmother's 101st birthday with a Fredrickson family reunion. My Grandma Kay died a few years ago...but we use the date as the opportunity to gather and remind us from where we came.

As crazy as this was...I love that my mother's best friend from high school came to perform as a clown at our family reunion.

This was just after my brother Blair sent a text to Dean sitting in the seat next to him..."I wish that clown could make me disappear!"

 I love that Clown Miriam showed the kids how to blow bubbles...

 and the teenage girls were thinking this clown is nuts!

 Brown eyes run deep in my family...almost black. I love that baby Cohen has the most expressive faces anchored by those big brown eyes.

 Cousin power...

 I love how it moves from generation to generation never losing it's force!

Katie Scarlet...we already know how much I adore her! Look how she adores that rice-krispie-chocolate thing she is lusting after.

And I love, love, love...that no matter when I see my brother, he is proudly wearing his yellow Jiggy bracelet and tells me how much he misses my daughter.

 When Cohen's mama wasn't looking, I love that Dean fed him a cupcake...

 and Cohen slurped up every sugary morsel!

I noticed Thing 1 and Thing 2 running around and then found mischievous Thing 3, but was thrilled when I finally discovered that my cousin had a Thing 4!

Able to dead lift over 355 pounds, my niece Chalise is so buff. I am impressed that she and hubby Chris competed in a Cross Fit competition just before the party.

 I love that my brother is always the king of the ruckus, throwing water balloons at his grandson...

 and then running away as fast as he can.

Following the water fight, I love that my beautiful niece asked if I would take a photo of her and her hubby of seven years...and I captured this one!

 See what I mean about those gorgeous deep brown eyes...they are everywhere!

Suntanned faces will soon start to fade into winter pale. But the memories of great family moments like these will never fade. Family...it's what life is all about, isn't it?